Princess for a week

I poured my cousin’s prune juice into my coffee this morning. 

The cabin was dark, and I was stunned out of a glorious sleep-in sleep by room service or a stewart (not so sure what staff is called on a giant cruise vessel). Shadowy environments like this (and yesterday’s cave-like spa room that had me accidently giving my massage therapist almost the price of the treatment in tip $) apparently makes me a generous, clumsy and gullible old person. Those who know me well know I’d never spend $100 on a beauty product but did so yesterday when the flawless-skinned therapist suggested a fancy cooling aide guaranteed to calm my arthritic lower back. I blame my uncharacteristic frivolity and fair thee wellLet It Go-attitude on Cruise Life with Friends and One Family Member in the Eastern Caribbeans, and the 15 beverage-a-day drink package. 

It’s Day Three of a seven-day cruise on the Sky Princess, a massive beast of an ocean liner that feels like Las Vegas at sea. Early-to-bed, early-to-rise me was sitting at an off-Broadway-caliber rock opera last night that didn’t start until 9:30 p.m. ! Yep, the over-used exclamation point is appropriate in this case as I would never, as in NEVER, dream of rocking out at such a twilight hour, much less top off the starry night with dancing, and chatting-it-up with friends. 

What’s happening to me? I’ve turned into ah one-a and a two-a, baton swinging, pop the champagne, smile at the camera, Lawrence Welk-loving Mom and Dad.

Girth and grey. That b me. 

It’s crazy: Me and most of the 3,650 passengers aboard Princess’ year-old ship are generationally aligned, yet I view myself as younger, more hopeful, believing that the route ahead is bright and promising and that, if I really wanted to, I could be on that stage singing and dancing and, even though I’d suck, I secretly wish the emcee would pick me to rock out with the gorgeous, talented runners-up of The Voice cruise stars. 

Maybe that’s why I agreed to sign up for today’s acupressure session with the doctor from Indian: Because I don’t want to be doomsday crunchy arthritic, pot-bellied and double-chinned anymore; I want to be Leonardo DiCaprio’s Kate Winslet as a senior citizen. When you think about it, the younger version of ourselves is still there, page 125 of a book we’re constantly writing and re-writing. Physicality is an illusion, an ever-changing version of our same selves. The good stuff, the stuff worth loving, is always there—-no matter the outside package—hopefully, being cherished and nurtured by its author. I know this to be true, yet why was I so gullible when my cousin and I went to an “educational” session about pricey collagen treatment, and there I was, my cheapskate self, ready to take out my credit card? 

“I can look younger six months from now after one treatment?” where do I sign up. Thank God for my voice of reason, my cousin, who talked me down and said, “We have to research it first.”

Truth is, when I get back to “real life” I’d never do this kind of thing. Too careful with my money. So, for now, the saggy jowls are going to have to sail in the wind as aging Kate Winslet’s melting candle wax body sags across the bow into tomorrow. 

Sitting here on the balcony with a drained cup of coffee, staring at the forever sea as we head to the Dominican Republic. I never, ever thought I’d vacation on a cruise ship with my beloved cousin and high school pals, Julie and Mona, and a collection of new friends. But here I am, not seasick for the first time in my life, celebrating all things joyful. Like cruise food.

So far, my cousin and I have only eaten at the buffet where they have tons of healthy food choices. That’s mostly our jam.  We eat veggies and I’m pleased to report there are many, many options throughout the day. We’ve learned what we like and what to avoid, and that we dig being served and have someone prepare and clean up after us. The booze package is surprisingly easy to resist because we’re not big fans of getting drunk. We’ve discovered we’re picky about the alcohol we consume: Turns out we’ve become wine snobs and upgrade our beverages to higher quality selections. We also figured out that ultra-sweet drinks leave us lethargic. So, we drink lots of water in between tipsy-producing beverages. I guess one of the perks of getting older is you realize is getting wasted wastes the next day and we don’t have nearly enough next days to waste.

We’re out at sea today which means complete relaxation—reading, a snooze at some point, and a dip in the pool and hot tub. Not a bad way to spend Taco Tuesday, or is it Wednesday or Monday or is this all just a dream?

Today’s wish, besides the wish I’m living, is to see a whale and/or jumping dolphins. If I keep looking, I’m sure they’re out there. Just like this crazy, wonderful life I’m living, a life I dreamed of, yet never actually thought I’d experience. The Adventure of Today, no matter where I am or what I’m doing, is pretty spectacular, minus the prune juice creamer.